Election 08: Judging the candidates by their teeth!

With the election season in full swing (almost due to complete its spinning process!), there’s important factors at play…from Sarah Palin’s wardrobe to Barack Obama being on the front cover of Men’s Vogue…fashion is a huge part.

I sat down with my good friend, cosmetic dentist to the stars, Dr. Jeff Golub-Evans (Vogue Magazine’s “Guru of Cosmetic Dentistry,”) and asked him to muse about the candidates’ smiles…and how he might have improved them.

Dr. Jeff and I chatted about how much hard work must go into all that smiling! “For John McCain it has been particularly hard work because his teeth are so short. They’ve been ground down through the years, a tell-tale sign of aging, so he has to work harder than the other candidates to smile!” Senator McCain has to physically force his mouth apart to show any upper teeth. Often that extra effort appears as a grimace or a sarcastic look, but it may very well be just the man trying harder to smile!

“Too bad; it could easily have been corrected!”

Dr Jeff says that as we mature, and the tissue of the face drops, we show more of our bottom teeth when we talk and less of our top teeth. Senator McCain was still talking with his top teeth four years ago, but his political shift to the right has been matched with the shift of his smile downward. McCain’s teeth are also much darker than the other three candidates’ teeth ….. another sign of aging.
“With so much emphasis on the look of the Republican vice-presidential candidate, with her $150,000 clothing allowance, and her $22,000 per week make up artist, you would think that someone in the McCain campaign might have suggested a $500 in-office dental whitening for the presidential candidate. . .it would have cost less than a Sarah Palin eyebrow for the day!”

As for the other side of the ballot…

“Senator Barak Obama has an engaging, inviting smile. His teeth are literally smiling. How clever!” It appears that he is radiating that big bold smile because his teeth are shaped in a arch form that is smiling. It’s a technique Dr. Jeff has used for years for the modeling industry. “It could be pointed out, on the other hand, that Senator Obama has “working class” teeth. His upper front teeth are out of synch with the rest of the smile, too big, too white. They are and will continue to be fodder for cartoonists, but their appeal lies in the fact that they are not perfect, that they were probably not crafted with the idea that the man whose spaces and irregularities were being fixed would be eventually running for President of the United States.”

And on to everyone’s very favorite SNL character sketch subject…

“Governor Sarah Palin has TV Beauty Pageant teeth. Through the years I have provided that cookie-cutter smile style hundreds of times for beauty contestants, aspiring actresses, even Hooters girls. Hers are a perfect match for her, kind of Stepford Wife-like, delivering the message that she’s an All-American girl and not that smart.”

And then there’s Joe Biden. “Senator Joe Biden has an exaggerated Bill Clintonesque presidential look, and has been well made : gray hair transplants, well fitted suits, and cosmetic dentistry. He looks the part, though some might say that he is a living caricature of a presidential look combined with a used car salesman, with a smile that is a bit too perfect, a bit too white, and a bit too wide.” But when Dr Alfano, the former Dean of New York University College of Dentistry, mentioned at a graduation ceremony several years ago , that an over 70-something morning talk show host, (Regis), had “successfully raised the bar on white,” it gave permission for almost-70-somethings, like Senator Biden, to do the same.

What about the past smiling history of our presidents? “George W. Bush has his father’s old man smile, Clinton and Kennedy had celebrity smiles, Eisenhower’s was grandfatherly and Reagan’s smile was off-centered. It is well-known that George Washington sported a set of wooden teeth, though Paul Revere also made a set for him on a metal base.”

Could it have possibly been made with lighter teeth for special public occasions?

A smile – and what it means – goes a long way! Keep all this in mind when you vote on Tuesday!