Getting Cheeky With Britney (Again)
August 31, 2007 by Liberty Kontranowski
Filed under Accessories, Dresses, Fashion Miss, Shoes, Singers
TMI, Brit-Brit. TMI.
Oh, does this chick ever make my job easy. Seriously. I almost feel bad (well, not really) capitalizing on such a troubled young lady, but jeez, when you are already walking a thin line in the “normalcy” department and then you pull a stunt like this…whatever. She’s asking for it, dahlings, don’t you think?
Anyway, here are some of my theories on why this newest Britney mishap may have occurred:
Maybe she didn’t even realize it happened. Maybe she was in such a blasted hurry to get where she was going that she forgot to put on her pants. Or skirt. (But oy, let’s hope she remembered the undies this time!)
Maybe this thing that should clearly be worn as a top was once a dress that she put in the dryer a few too many times and shrunk to death unknowingly.
Maybe she was hot and felt like she needed a little breeze “down there”.
Maybe she was on her way to a nudist beach and decided to get a head start.
Maybe she thought that her way-too-heavy-for-summer-boots would make up for the lack of material northward.
Maybe, with those long-ass hair extensions, she was on her way to a Lady Godiva photo shoot and didn’t want to be bothered with disrobing for any length of time.
Maybe she was trying to make a statement that post-baby ass cheeks are beautiful ass cheeks, dimples and all.
Maybe she’s just Brit being Brit. Again.
This is too good not to ask for your thoughts, dahlings. Come on, weigh in. I love to hear from my regulars, of course, but I’m salivating at the thought of hearing from others as well. So, come on, grab a drinkie of your choice and let loose. It’s the Friday before a holiday weekend, after all. Let’s party! (Oh wait, I better not say “party” too loud or Britney and her butt cheeks might show up. Gah!)
P.S. A big shout out goes to my pal Kori over at Shoe Blitz for alerting me of this pic. Thanks, love. Your Manolos are on their way.
WTF????? This chick needs to be committed!!
Agreed, Rhonda. Didn’t her mother teach her about keeping one’s privates to one’s self? Damn.
Maybe she’s saying “Kiss My A**” with an unnecessary visual aid.
Makes me want to buy her some granny briefs.
KMart has great granny briefs (I hear). Hook the girl up, Schadenfreude. The whole world will be thanking you.
Did her butt always look like that? Maybe in her heyday, it looked OK, and she hasn’t seen her own backside for a while, so she assumes nothing has changed?
Shrooms. The woman must be high on shrooms. No other explanation.
Now if I were to walk out of the house in that, my husband would have me committed, but isn’t Brit wealthy enough to have like.. um… a fashion consultant around to say something along the lines of, “Hey, Chica, it’s really not showcasing your best features….”
No excuse for something like this. Even I, the fashionably retarded, know better.
Oooh I just got one of those VS Free Panty cards. Hell, we should all send those to her, chick obviously needs some.
Yanno, Kim, there was once a day when I would’ve died to have her ass. Now, I would sew my head to the carpet just to NOT have her ass. My how times change.
Rachel, how’s about a second career while your novel’s on submission? You could be Brit’s stylist. Fashion retard or not, it can’t get much worse than it already is. Go for it.
Anyway, I tend to agree on the shrooms theory. In fact, the pattern on her shirt (notice I didn’t say *dress*) is a little shroomily-trippy, no?
Hey Star – I got one of those too, and though I covet free *anything*, I’d gladly contribute to the “Cover Britney’s Ass” Movement. You want to spearhead, or shall I?
Kidding! This poor chick is so not worth our time. Besides, if she started behaving normally, I would greatly miss shredding her and that would be a crying shame.
Anyway, a big THANKS for stopping by, Star. I hope you come again. I checked out your site, too, and it’s quite fabby (and if you ever find yourself tiring of your beautiful almond Marc Jacobs, I’ll keep her with *me* for a while, wink-wink.
Oh Lordy. Between her and Lindsay, I’m contemplating on moving to Timbuktu. They’re breaking my heart.
hey!
whoa——-WTF is right. Where is that cellulite removal creme! Dimples surely belong on your face not on your dupah!
“Dimpled dupahs, bad. Dimpled faces, good.”
Brit should write this 1000 times on her driveway with sidewalk chalk. Or the melted chocolate that she’s obviously still consuming even after her pregnancy days. Sigh.