Snarkstress » Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan Still Looking Sad and Old

The Snarkstress — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 07:00:47 +0000

Help!! I’m addicted to posting terrible pictures of Lindsay Lohan!!! I tell myself, let the girl slide this time…she’s probably just hungover and you shouldn’t slam her everytime she looks sad and haggard. But I just can’t help myself!

So….here she is again…the infamous young escapee from rehab on her way to the red carpet at the Rock the Casbah Gala in Hollywood. What is the deal with her hair??? I’m wondering if she hangs out with Kim from The Real Housewives of Atlanta because it definitely looks like she’s wearing an old ratty wig. Hmm…as I investigate closer it looks like she has some brown roots so maybe this is real hair!?? Crazy.

The girl is just worrying me because she looks sad and lonely at all of these red carpet events, but yet she still never misses one. She just looks awkward and embarrassed and the red carpet shots are no better.

LiLo…instead of hitting every red carpet event, get some sleep, get a mani/pedi, get a haircut, and eat a healthy meal. You need it.

Image: Flynet

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Lindsay Lohan Continues Going Downhill

The Snarkstress — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 21:49:28 +0000

UGH! I said I wouldn’t….but I just…can’t….help myself!! I posted a beautiful picture of my new happy fashion icon Alexa Chung at the Whitney Gala and said no no no I must not post a trainwreck red carpet shot of LiLo again. But I couldn’t resist! This poor girl just continues to stumble down and down! Right before our eyes! The crazy thing to me is that she must have a few clones running around because somehow she makes it to every party AND every red carpet. Why are red carpet photoshoots the one thing that she can manage to keep organized??

Anyways, here she is…the infamous Lindsay Lohan looking pale and desperate with overly puffy lips, destroyed bleached hair, grown-out nails, too much gold, and sad eyes. What is with that pose?? It is just asking for criticism.

Image: Zuma Press

Is it just me, or do LiLo’s hands look like a 60-year olds?? Take care of your skin, girl! At least get a manicure!

Image: Zuma Press

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Ali Lohan Turning into Lindsay

The Snarkstress — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 04:54:28 +0000

The infamous Lohan sisters have been spotted around Paris for Fashion Week looking pretty sad and scrawny. If I were invited to sit in the front row at some of the greatest fashion shows in the world, I think I would try to show a little bit of class and sophistication and maybe think twice about looking grumpy and dirty. But what was I thinking? That is definitely way too much to ask from the Lohan girls.

Image: Fame Pictures

It is just becoming a sad American pastime to watch these girls go from super cutey wholesome to total and complete disasters. Seriously I can barely watch anymore! For some reason I thought that Ali had a chance of NOT following in her sister’s footsteps and actually learning a bit from watching her transform into a rehab resident over and over again…but it looks like she’s turning into little LiLo right before our eyes.

Please Dina…you’ve got to do something before it’s too late! At least make them start eating…

Image: Fame Pictures

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Lindsay Lohan Can’t Do Much Worse

The Snarkstress — Sat, 29 Aug 2009 15:10:14 +0000

Will there ever come a day where Lindsay Lohan at least stabilizes the degree of crazy in her outfits? Oh sure, sneak past the paparazzi to host a 6126 Pop-Up Shop Party at Revolve Clothing in West Hollywood. But they are just going to be there when you get out, and I think we both know how trashy and cheap you really look here, Lindsay.

The boots could be super sexy under different circumstances, but your leather glove and awfully skimpy dress don’t stand a chance. Honestly, Lindsay…by the time you’re ready for your big comeback/turnaround/revamp, the paparazzi are going to have moved on to the next trainwreck. And no one is going to care that you finally put down the bottle and found a dress that fits.

Image: Fame Pictures

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Lindsay Lohan Goes Back To Blonde

The Snarkstress — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 16:19:02 +0000

I’m not sure if I’m more surprised to see Lindsay Lohan back as a bottle blonde or hear that she actually has acting work and will be starring in a feature film with Robert De Niro. Either way, it’s quite a change for Lohan, though what hasn’t changed is her attraction to sheer tops, ugly shoes, big sunglasses and purses that remind everyone around her of just how big of a celebrity she is (or so she thinks).

What are the odds that this new movie will be a flop? Have we started taking bets yet? Tough to tell, but if Lohan looks this groggy after getting her hair done and doing a little shopping, I imagine she’ll have some difficulties keeping up on set.

Not that her past behaviour is any indication of whether or not Lohan will misbehave while filming.

Image: Fame Pictures

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Lindsay Lohan’s Milkshake Brings All The…

The Snarkstress — Sat, 25 Jul 2009 00:35:00 +0000

You know…I would love to say that this was a publicity stunt for a new movie. Or even a little on the job training for Lindsay Lohan in preparation for a new role. But no. No, instead this is Lindsay making her very own milkshake at Millions of Milkshakes in West Hollywood. I’m sure no one is surprised that the place was packed to see a goofy looking (and ahem, rather skeletal looking) Lindsay Lohan making milkshakes and posing for the camera.

I’m pretty sure this amounts to one of the worst celebrity spectacles I’ve seen in quite some time. Is this girl ever going to get back on track? I mean really…how much more do we have to endure before she runs out of money and has to actually earn a living again? Please, for the love of all things holy…tell me that day is soon.

Image: Fame Pictures

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Lindsay Lohan Can Look Cheap In All Black

The Snarkstress — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 00:24:22 +0000

Are we ever going to see Lindsay Lohan look like anything more than a washed up trainwreck of a former child star? I mean really…is there anything to salvage at this point…because if not, can we please get the paparazzi to pay attention to someone else who isn’t so predictably sloppy looking. Now.

In theory, there are elements of a decent outfit here. Hard to go wrong with aviators, and I’m sure the black dress would look alright if it wasn’t making her look like a coat rack. The shoes…well, I can’t stand them, though I’m sure many will disagree with me. Fringe around the ankles is just cruel unless you have issues with food, thereby causing your legs to look like veiny toothpicks.

I just want to see the chipper little darling from The Parent Trap reinvent herself into something half decent and noteworthy again. Is that too much to ask, Lindsay? Is it?

Image: Lindsay Lohan

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Lindsay Lohan At Bungalow 8

The Snarkstress — Fri, 05 Jun 2009 23:24:18 +0000

I don’t even know what can be said about Lindsay Lohan anymore – other than this decline into pathetic misery is rivaling the stupidity that was bald Britney Spears.

Here she is arriving, and quickly leaving Bungalow 8 where ex-girlfriend Samantha Ronson was performing. It’s sad enough when you play these games and there aren’t a gaggle of photographers around you. But that Lindsay is acting this childish and mopey about her lost love in front of an audience…come on, girl – move on. She’s just not that into you…

Image: Bauer Griffin

I do like the scarf, even if the girl wearing it makes me cringe for teenagers who might still look up to her. (Please say they’ve all moved on to someone else? Yes? Please?) But the ratty hair extensions and erratic behavior couldn’t save this scarf, let alone any last bit of hope that Lindsay might become a normal functioning member of society any time soon.

Image: Bauer Griffin

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Lindsay Lohan Channels Marilyn…again.

The Snarkstress — Thu, 07 May 2009 20:23:08 +0000

Haven’t we all seen this movie before? Oh, sorry…not movie. When was Lindsay’s last movie?

Let me be more specific…has Lindsay Lohan not already done a photoshoot where she dresses up like Marilyn Monroe.

Oh, that’s right. She did.

I’m so unbelievably tired of this girl. Why do I feel like Vogue is paying for a spoiled party girl to play dress up? Is her appeal in Spain really that big? Please tell me no…I just don’t want to know.

For a minute there, somewhere around six months ago, I had hope that Lindsay might fade away completely. Or come back as a normal functioning human being who might be able to get a job.

Now I just can’t imagine that happening anytime soon.

Image: Splash News

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Lindsay Lohan’s Orange Sevin Nyne Tan

The Snarkstress — Fri, 01 May 2009 17:13:01 +0000

Lindsay Lohan and Sephora hosted a party in Santa Monica to launch her new tanning mist, Sevin Nyne. While everyone was concerned with getting all the details of the festivities organized and perfect, it appears no one thought to make sure that the guest of honor’s skin didn’t look like a tangerine.

Image: INF

It might also have been a good idea to ask dear Lindsay to gallivant around in skimpy bikinis where photographers might not find her. I’m sure a friend or two has a private pool, right? Did no one think that the timing of it all?

I will say this is the best Lindsay’s hair has looked in a long time, but I’m utterly disappointed by how orange her face looks considering the reason for this event. Someone needs to be fired.

Image: INF

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